The Process:
Accepting It
While thinking of acceptance, I am always reminded of a poem, probably by Rabindranath Tagore, which is about bride. Her bridegroom died in the war, but she didn't cry. She couldn't Not even a single teardrop in her eye. People were crying around, but stood there standing still, only shocked by the event. As the lover had told her before going to war, that when he dies the wind will bring her the news of his death. She then hears the wind telling her this news and she eventually breaks down, mourning for his death.
The first part of dealing with pain is accepting it. Accepting it the way it is. Unless you accept the event, or keep on lying that it didn't happen or it is delusion of the past, then I must say stop it.
‘My relationship with my wife is on the verge of divorce.’ Accept it, without thinking whether it should have happened or not. Now start thinking and doing what is to be done to improve the relations. ‘I am fat.’ Accept it. Don’t blame yourself or anyone. Now, let’s work a way out by controlling appetite and exercising. ‘I lag in my studies, I may fail. I am worried.’ OK Accept it. Stop worrying. Start studying. ‘I am getting old but my family doesn't give me the respect I should get.’ Accept it. Now find a way to be a part of them instead of them being part of me.
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